World's Strongest Man

Listen to World's Strongest Man

I was in Denmark with an Indian hoop dancer, Eddie Swimmer (he’s on a USPS stamp). We came in from a night of reverie around 4:00 am and this giant man (6’7” 300+lbs) was on the couch in the lobby with his arm around a beautiful model type woman. He looks at us and says, “Indians.”

Eddie Swimmer USPS Stamp

I look at him and say, “Vikings.”

He says, “That’s right.”

I tell him, “I think Vikings were in America before Columbus.”

“That’s right,” he says. “We came there, chopped off a few of your heads and came home.”

“We chopped off some of your heads, as well,” I add.

“F* you!” he says and flips me the bird.

So, I tell him “F* you!” and return the bird.

Eddie grabs me out of there, pushes me in the elevator and nervously presses the button to our floor, before something really starts.

Breakfast in Europe is early and if you miss it, you miss out. So, I was up again in a few hours. I had made friends with the Pakistani night clerk and he calls me over. “Keith, come here. Look who you say ‘fuck you’ to last night.” The bulky Viking we’d had the run-in with was from Iceland and it turns out he’d just won the World’s Strongest Man competition.

Later, I’m eating breakfast alone and the World’s Strongest Man comes up to my table. Towering over me, he makes a chopping sign at his neck and stares down at me. He says, “No one ever told me ‘Fuck you.’ I like you Indian,” and lets out a big laugh.

We shake hands and become friends over the next few days. Every time we’d meet after that, we would say “F* you!” to each other. People couldn’t figure it out.

Keith